i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm at about main and main street
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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