are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize