my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
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