their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just pee around me
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
