is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
