Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
