don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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