we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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