Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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