I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I look excited, but its just a facade.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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