There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I am available for nakedness
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize