I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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