I'm gonna have a badass scar
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize