C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
