she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
