i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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