I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
