look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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