I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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