What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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