when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
