i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
