sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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