Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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