Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
