We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
