I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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