Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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