Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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