and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
