i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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