Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
so let's talk penis.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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