Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
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Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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