Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
