Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
