the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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