in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
We left an ass print on the piano.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Randomize
