i don't like sucking hair
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
