Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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