Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
