I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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