Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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