ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
