how can u be prego again
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
