it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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