we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
