I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
