butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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