so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize