Cold hands, warm shart.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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